Parenting Manifesto…

Hi friends,

After hearing time after time about the wise Brené Brown(from Jen Hatmaker, Glennon Melton, Oprah and watching her TED talk on The Power of Vulnerability that is one of most watched TED talks of all time)

I stumbled upon her parenting philosophy/mantra/rules/manifesto that she wrote for her family.  When I first heard this, I thought oh shoot, maybe we should make or write a manifesto for our family.  But with the age of my kids and where we are at, I quickly thought – this was so beautifully written and so spot on – I just want to use hers as my parenting philosophy/rules/manifesto.  So I thought I would drop this in today – if any of you need this as an inspiration.  I have this copied in my OneNote to read, with the goal of getting it printed and either framed or just hung up on my bathroom mirror.  Context below:

…I  wrote the following parenting manifesto because I need it. Steve and I need it. Putting down the measuring stick in a culture that uses acquisitions and accomplishments to assess worth is not easy. I use the manifesto as a touchstone, a prayer, and a meditation when I’m wrestling with vulnerability or when I’ve got that “never enough” fear. It reminds me of a finding that changed and probably saved my life: Who we are and how we engage with the world are much stronger predictors of how our children will do than what we know about parenting.

 

The Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto

Above all else, I want you to know that you are loved and lovable. You will learn this from my words and actions—the lessons on love are in how I treat you and how I treat myself.

I want you to engage with the world from a place of worthiness. You will learn that you are worthy of love, belonging, and joy every time you see me practice self-compassion and embrace my own imperfections.

We will practice courage in our family by showing up, letting ourselves be seen, and honoring vulnerability. We will share our stories of struggle and strength. There will always be room in our home for both.

We will teach you compassion by practicing compassion with ourselves first; then with each other. We will set and respect boundaries; we will honor hard work, hope, and perseverance. Rest and play will be family values, as well as family practices.

You will learn accountability and respect by watching me make mistakes and make amends, and by watching how I ask for what I need and talk about how I feel.

I want you to know joy, so together we will practice gratitude.

I want you to feel joy, so together we will learn how to be vulnerable.

When uncertainty and scarcity visit, you will be able to draw from the spirit that is a part of our everyday life.

Together we will cry and face fear and grief. I will want to take away your pain, but instead I will sit with you and teach you how to feel it.

We will laugh and sing and dance and create. We will always have permission to be ourselves with each other. No matter what, you will always belong here.

As you begin your Wholehearted journey, the greatest gift that I can give to you is to live and love with my whole heart and to dare greatly.

I will not teach or love or show you anything perfectly, but I will let you see me, and I will always hold sacred the gift of seeing you. Truly, deeply, seeing you.

 

Isn’t that beautiful?? Isn’t that perfect?? What do you think?  Has anyone written their own?  I didn’t know that was a thing until I read hers – I love this so much.  I just loved reading it again while I shared with you all.  Hope it helps shed some light on this parenting journey, where it feels as if we are walking blindly into the unknown, hoping we don’t trip and fall too much, and can all come out without too many bumps and bruises.